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Bite Your Tongue


‘Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. ‘

Ephesians 4:29 NIV


What are the words that come from our mouths, especially when we are by ourselves? I know that there are times that I have said some really not so wholesome things. I remember driving along and was about to make a turn and some other driver cut me off. I was unnerved, to say the least. I didn’t shout anything but all these negative words came out talking about his IQ level and his lack of courtesy. Had someone been in the car with me I would not have said that. I realized that the words that came out were my first reaction. I am embarrassed to say that but my words are not always encouraging or helpful. 

Jesus desires us to lead a life that is changed like our clothes (v.24). He knows where we came from and still chose to die for us so that we can be given a new start to build up and help others in the unification of the Body of Christ. Not limited to the church but to others as well. We cannot speak one way around church members and another way to those that do not follow Christ.  Paul says here to “not let any unwholesome talk come from our mouths.” Any means any, so we are to take care of what leaves our mouths for once it has left, there is no way to talk them back.


Over the past couple of weeks, the phrase, “bite my tongue” has been running through my mind especially when I am about to speak to my son. You see, I have been not so happy with his attitude and actions, so I confess that the words that have been coming from my mouth have not been encouraging. So in order to avoid saying something that has been hurtful or in anger, I have been literally biting my tongue to remind myself. Now it hasn’t been all the time and I do let words slip from my mouth but at least for me, it is a reminder to stop talking and listen, to not react, but to wait and respond in a way that will be beneficial to all. 

Not only this will stop unwholesome talk from coming from my mouth, but I need to check my heart. Recently, I have noticed I have been holding onto hurts. I have been holding onto times I felt disrespected, I felt attacked, and I have felt unloved or appreciated. Romans 12:17-18 NIV reads, “Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” I need to check my heart and make sure that there is no lingering unforgiveness in my heart. With those lingering feelings in my heart, nothing but complaining and words I will regret later will come out of my mouth. 


Lord Jesus, thank you for speaking to me this morning about being cautious about the words that come from my mouth. I ask for your forgiveness for when I have said things that were hurtful or not encouraging to others. Please touch my heart and cleanse it of anything that keeps me from speaking words that are helpful or beneficial to others. I forgive those that have hurt me and I chose to release the pain and hurt in my heart to you. Please take it and restore me your joy and mercy. I love you and help me to speak words to build up my family, the church, and those around me. I pray this in Your Name, Jesus. Amen.





エペソ4:29 NIV



イエス様は、私たちが衣服のように変化した人生を送ることを望んでおられます(24節)。私たちがどこから来たかを知っていて、それでも私たちのために死ぬことを選んでくださったので、私たちは新しいスタートを切り、キリストのからだの統一のために他の人々を建て上げ、助けることができるのです。教会に限らず、他の人々に対してもです。私たちは、教会のメンバーにはある言い方をし、キリストに従わない人々には別の言い方をすることはできません。  パウロはここで、”私たちの口から不健全な話が出ないように “と言っています。Anyとは、あらゆるという意味ですから、私たちは自分の口から出るものに気をつけなければなりません。一度出てしまったものは、もう言い返すことができないのです。


ここ数週間、特に息子と話をする時に、”bite my tongue “というフレーズが頭の中を駆け巡ります。息子の態度や行動に不満があり、正直言って、私の口からは励ましの言葉が出てきません。だから、怒りにまかせて傷つけるようなことを言わないように、文字通り舌を噛んで自分に言い聞かせているのです。でも、少なくとも私にとっては、話すのをやめて耳を傾け、反応せずに待って、すべての人にとって有益になるような反応をするためのリマインダーになっています。

そうすることで、私の口から不健全な言葉が出るのを防ぐだけでなく、自分の心をチェックする必要があるのです。最近、私は自分が傷ついたことをずっと引きずっていることに気づきました。見下されていると感じたり、攻撃されていると感じたり、愛されていないと感じたり、感謝されていないと感じたりしたことが、ずっと心に残っているのです。ローマ12:17-18(NIV)には、「悪に対して悪を返してはなりません。誰の目にも正しいことをするように気をつけなさい。もし可能なら、あなた次第で、すべての人と平和に暮らしなさい。” とあります。私は自分の心をチェックして、許せない気持ちが残っていないことを確認する必要があります。そのような思いが残っていると、文句や後で後悔するような言葉しか出てきません。



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